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Joined 3 years ago
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Cake day: August 5th, 2023

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  • Delayed response, but raise a ticket in retros saying retros should be cancelled. Andvwhrn asked why, say nothing is followed upon or learn so there is no point doing them.

    Then you can talk shit about them and make clear without change, you won’t commit time to next one as there is no point.

    Could be fun to see what the response is.




  • You’re trusting a PO to decide on how you build? They ain’t coders. They decide on value, you estimate and build and they prioritise based on the information you provide. POs aren’t the boss of devs. That’s usually engineering managers. You are both specialists in your field. You don’t lecture them on value and how pointless a feature is, you size it, and using velocity they can anticipate how much will likely be delivered in next sprint. If they really object, “if you feel you can build it in 1 day, go ahead, ill give you access. I have no idea how that could be done”

    PO wouldn’t like it during live incident when shit goes wrong that you suggest “I did highlight the risk of this occurring and proposed mitigation steps but was overruled”.


  • “True. It’ll be perfectly fine, and because of that, you won’t need me on call when it all goes dramatically wrong. If you need access to the repo, I’ll add you in though. Good luck.”

    Or, if you’ve worked together a while “like I overthought it when we worked on x, and y went wrong, and I called it before it happened. Turns out I’m quite good at seeing car crashes in advance.”


  • Mad? In a professional workplace?

    “If you can give me that issue free codebase, I’m happy to do that, but failing that, it takes 3 days to add that feature that is akin to the leaning tower of Piza taped together with duct tape. There is only so much tech debt you can pile on until you are in code hell, and unfortunately, we are.”

    If they do some weird ass schedule “well, you can write down that if you wish, feel free to write down that my other car is a Bugatti, if we are just theorising on a perfect unicorn world”.



  • “Why are we only learning about this now? I think we need to look into the process that work comes into the team otherwise, if we don’t learn, we are going to take the website down and cost the company thousands/millions”. There is a reason retros exist.

    “You ask me how long it’ll take, and it’s 3 days. You probably need to manage expectations on this. Maybe let them know the risks of x, y and z and why it will take this long”.






  • Depends where you work.

    If you’re good and they respect you , you’ll get away with “no” or, “I’ll build it, but if it goes wrong, I’m not fixing this evening and weekends”. Safest option is “in all honesty, I cannot see another credible option, no” and if you’re fed up of the follow up, drop the word credible.